Dear diary...

I finally find a normal guy who is interested in me and that I also find nice. And I meet him a month before he is moving to a place nearly 300 km from here. He meets me and decides that he want to give this place one more shot and tries to get his job back. But gets a NO!

Yesterday I dared to invite him for supper and a movie and I dared to tell him when it was time to go. I'm proud! I feel much more confident right now and a lot is thanks to my colluege but also to my self. He wanted to come to me late tonight but I turned to my heart and asked it what it felt. It was scared for not be able to say goodnight later. I want to get to know this guy in slowmotion and not fastforward everything because I can't say no. That's no longer my behavior.

I feel very scared and nervous around him and said that to him too. Also good for being me :). Now my defenses are kicking in and they are only letting me see all the things that are wrong with me seeing him. But I'm strong and I'm trying to do the opposit of what my fears are telling me to do but still what I want. It's a thin line between theese two.

And today I turned 26 and there is nothing to do about it. Feels good though! Everyone else is also old *mohahahahahah*

That was just a little update!

Being 26....

A short message to a person soon turning 26 from a person who turned 26 five weeks ago ;)
First of all: don't worry, life is still te same when you're 26 (or is that something to worry about??)
Second: being single and 26 is trendy (or otherwise we will set the trend)
Third: They say that 40 is the new 30 (so then I think: 30 is the new 20, 20 is the new 10 which means that we are in our teens ;P )
Forth: F*ck age, it is nothing but a number (be 25 for the rest of your life)
Five: ...(this one is up to you)

Dear diary...

... I don't want to be worst than my dear dare angel friend. I have very much anciety for the moment and it's mostly because I feel like I'm standing in the same spot and not moving forward. I need change but I'm too afraid and I don't know wich change I should make. I've fallen in love with a man I can't be together with and that hurts a lot. I just feel alone and sad right now.

Dear dare angel friend, I'm happy to hear that you are feeling better. Thank good that you got that sorted out and took the help that was given to you. Lots of hugs

I've also found a video that has great lyrics and that I feel very close to.

Death cab for cuties at your service:
I will possess your heart




Sorry that I can't be any more hopefull today.

Dear diary...

...just because.Because I am in blogging-mood ;)Because I wanted to post and share this great song (especially the lyrics) for such a long time.

Eat, Pray, Love!

It seems like currently everyone is reading this book, I can imagine you are too. I received it for my birthday while I just had bought it for another friends' birthday who in turn also had received it twice...

Anyway, normally I am not that much into these 'books-that-have been-recommended-by-Oprah-and-read-by-overhysterical-housewives'. Excuse me for this quite offending generalizing typification. And in the end: I have also read 'the secret' so maybe I am part of this group but I just don't want to admit it yet ;)

However this is different: Even though I have not read the whole book yet, I already feel like it came into my life at the right time. -As I interprete it- the writer is at a point in her life where she realizes she needs change and decides (and more importantly: DARES) to get rid of the secure life, the life that people expect you to be happy in. It encourages to take chance and not go the path that has already been paved for you.

To give you an update on my life: I have the feeling that at the moment I have found the peace that I needed for years. Of course I have not done that on my own. The combination of the haptonomist and medicines have given me a balance that I have not felt for years. It's so strange and I can't explain it. It sounds very philosophical I know, but I have the feeling that in many aspects in my life there is no need to hurry because no one expects me to (or at least should expect me to). I live my life the way I want to live my life and not the life of others.

Dear dare angel, how is your life at the moment?

To Dare Angel: Reaction on Test

Dear Dare partner, In response to your post on the other blog I decided to do the personality test too and this was my result. It's quite adequate compared to other tests I have taken. What do you think??

Your personality type:

Quietly forceful, original and sensitive. Tend to stick to things until they are done. Extremely intuitive about people and concerned for their feelings. Well-developed value systems which they strictly adhere to. Well-respected for their perserverence in doing the right thing. Likely to be individualistic, rather than leading or following.

Careers that could fit you includes:

Counselors, clergy, missionaries, teachers, medical doctors, dentists, chiropractors, psychologists, psychiatrists, writers, musicians, artists, psychics, photographers, child care workers, education consultants, librarians, marketeers, scientists, social workers.